Label / Cat. No: RCA Camden CDS 1105
First Released: 1972

What The Album Blurb Says…

If there’s a recipe for an album that sets out to combine the very best in songs with the best in orchestral performances, then Cyril Ornadel has surely achieved it with this collection. What’s more he’s managed it with a style and a panache that has, quite rightly, placed him in the forefront of music makers.

Certainly he’s had the very best of ingredients to work with because names like Kaempfert, Lennon and McCartney, Bernstein, and Simon and Garfunkel find a ready acceptance and respect from all musicians. In compiling this album, Cyril Ornadel hasn’t just set out to make an LP that is perfection by musical standards, although that’s as much a part of the album as anything, but on a broader basis he’s created an album that is rich in the kind of musical pleasure that stems from listening to old favourites like “Lazy hazy crazy days of summer”, “Strangers in the night”, “In the midnight hour” and “Zorba’s Dance”. They’re songs that have a lasting popularity and listening to the Stereo Action Orchestra perform them it’s easy to see just why they’re so frequently played. But although you’ve heard them before under different guises we can safely guarantee that in the hands of Cyril Ornadel they remain not only great melodies but lasting moments of enjoyment.

What I Say

“Thrill to the exciting sounds of Stereo Spectacular” shouts the rather garish cover. “An LP that is perfection by musical standards” and ” We can safely guarantee….lasting moments of enjoyment” shrill the cover notes.

Big words indeed. But can the Stereo ACTION Orchestra (I like to type it like that, as it makes them seem even MORE dynamic) live up to those words. Or is Cyril Ornadel all piss and wind?

Actually, it’s kind of difficult to tell, because whoever engineered this album must’ve been thinking about something else at the time. I was expecting one of those Stereo demonstration albums where everything is mixed either to the extreme left or the extreme right so that stereo salesmen in shiny grey suits can demonstrate the AWESOME power of the latest groovy hi-fi.

What seems to have happened is that everything is mixed pretty much near the centre, but occasionally the levels drop out, and so the extremes are of volume not of audio panorama. Either you have a very poor sound engineer who doesn’t know the difference between left and right and up and down, or somebody thought that this could be a job for the work-experience boy ‘cos nobody would notice.

It’s also clear that Cyril is an equal opportunities employer, as everyone gets a shot at the vocal melody, each instrument getting a line or two, though not too much now as there’s a lot of instruments to get through. Oh, and let’s not worry about contrasting mellifluous pipes with grating buzz guitar; it only serves to make the listening experiences more enjoyable…

The overall effect is listening to the endless demo on a 1980’s keyboard. It’s a showcase of all the sounds that it can create, but without any real consideration being given to the internal harmony of the piece. Sure, it can make lots of different sounds, but do we want all of them, all the time?

And there’s a strange mix of songs here – a bit of soul, a bit of musical theatre, some 60’s pop and some classic ‘oldies’ all given the Cyril Ornadel treatment. I can just see him, working out the score, thinking “What Eleanor Rigby really needs is MORE BONGOS”. Fantastic. In fact, Eleanor Rigby is the perfect encapsulation of the whole of this album, so ENTIRE SONG available below. I am so good to you, it hurts.

One thing I particularly like about this journal is the surprises these albums sometimes turn up. I was amazed to find that Cyril wasn’t just a Blackpool Organist who got ideas above his station and created the Stereo ACTION Orchestra, but was, nay IS, a bit of a big-man in musical theatre. He’s a composer of original scores, and he’s even written a song that you may know – “If I Ruled The World”.

Strangely though, the partial discography on his biography doesn’t mention the Stereo ACTION Orchestra. Maybe I should e-mail them about their oversight.

Tracks

Side 1

A Hard Day’s Night
Strangers In The Night
The Magnificent Seven
Bridge Over Troubled Water
In The Midnight Hour

Side 2

If I Were A Rich Man
Serenade (From The Student Prince)
Those Lazy Hazy Crazy Days Of Summer
Zorba’s Dance
Eleanor Rigby

Final score:

7 out of 10

Label / Cat. No: Polydor Super 2371 054
First Released: No earlier than 1969

What The Album Blurb Says…

Even if it sounds like a contradiction in terms, it’s got to be said that James Last is first. First in providing orchestral “happy” music that splinters the so-called generation gap in popular musical taste.

Last is first when it comes to producing albums that sell. And sell and sell. Whatever the style of material – be it classical, discotheque, dance instrumental – the Last sound is first all over the world. The formula is deceptively simple. Select familiar themes, treat the melodic lines with respect, dress them up in arrangements where the emphasis is on bass and brass.

Many a bandleader has tried to do the same. But the Last “touch” is unique. Maybe that is the one-word summing-up of his amazing multi-million disc sales… he’s unique. It’s an overworked word in popular music, but James Last remains unique even when reproducing his disc sounds on stage.

A man’s music reflects the man himself, so they say. James Last is well-dressed, neat, dynamic, energetic – the last shows through in his love of ski-ing and tennis. His music, too, is well-dressed, neat, dynamic, energetic. The man himself likes parties, so it’s only right that his music has made a few million parties swing that little bit more.

Of course, communication is a lot to do with it. Even though James Last speaks German, he somehow communicates with English-speaking audiences. Or any other audiences, come to that.

Yet it was very much a matter of chance that drew James Last into the popular music field. As a kid he showed promise on piano so his parents encouraged him in a musical career. At the Conservatoire of Music In Bueckeburg, from the age of fourteen, he studied composition, double bass and piano. It looked very much as though he’d stick with the classics.

But after World War II, his schooldays behind him, he “discovered” American dance music. He formed his own band, playing double bass. His skill in arranging was evident and he joined the Northwest German Radio station in Hamburg, working with top artist like Caterina Valente and Helmut Zacharias.

His reputation grew. But he had so much to say musically that it was obviously better for him to say it himself. His first album “Non-Stop Dancing,’65″ was a massive seller. It’s been non-stop recording ever since. Each idea such as “Trumpet-A-Go-Go”, produced a whole series of albums. That’s why James Last really needs a disc catalogue all of his own.

Nowadays he spreads his wings all over the world. Canada, South Africa, Australia – most of the world knows now that Last is first. Bass and brass… happy music… distinctive sounds.

Distinctive sounds abound in this “Best of James Last” collection. There’s “Happy Heart” and “Happy Music” to stress that Last orchestrations are built both to last and to give lasting pleasure. Or try “Games That Lovers Play” and hear for ourself that much-recorded numbers don’t have to have that well-worn feel to them.

Perhaps there are some people who don’t succumb to the charms of a James Last album. But it’s odds- on that they are in some mysterious form of coma.

Peter Jones.

What I Say

Oh, so “A man’s music reflects the man himself” is what they say is it? Well, I looked and it seems that nobody is saying that. I don’t wish to call Peter Jones a liar, but I think he’s overstating the case somewhat. I mean, I can accept that music may be described as “neat, dynamic, energetic,” but ‘well-dressed’? Can I expect to one of his ‘Happy Tunes’ to turn up at my place wearing a cravat and plus fours? I think not.

And look, the man’s not even called ‘James Last’. All these years his grinning, bearded face has been staring out at me from Charity Shop records, and I found out today that his real name is Hans. It’s as if I never knew the man at all.

However, I am prepared to forgive him, for I can understand that in post-war Britain and America, a musical act called Hans might not go down too well. But note, these sleeve notes seem to suggest that Herr Last’s schooldays ended roughly at the same time as the end of World War II. Just to remind you, they say, “But after World War II, his schooldays behind him, he “discovered” American dance music.” It might be slightly fairer to say he was exposed to American dance music thanks to the overwhelming presence of American armed forces in his country after the war.

Anyway, if this is the best of James Last, then I’m not sure what constitutes ‘the rest’. I’d liken this album to musical mashed potato – plain, unchallenging, reassuringly familiar and yet unrelentingly boring. Just a tip James / Hans, but not every tune can be spiced up with racy strings, driving snare drum rhythms and European backing singers adding textured washes over the top. Rather than bring out the beauty of the tunes, Herr Last’s skill is to homogenize them, until a song from a 60s musical sounds that same as a piece from Bizet or a traditional dance tune.

I can’t fault the music as such – it’s kept Mr Last very well in royalties, and there simply must be an audience for it, seeing as he manages to shift so many records. I think he suffers from the British disdain for anything popular in Europe. There’s something so cheesy about it, but there’s also a naivete, a lack of that cynical post-modern ‘knowingness’ that the English do so well.

Sadly, I can’t say that I’m unaffected by that, and still see Mr Last’s offerings as some kind of continental European speciality. Like crisp-bread, processed smoked cheese and window shutters instead of curtains, it’s something ‘enjoyed by foreigners’ which doesn’t quite translate.

However, easy listening comes no easier than this. Clearly a man at the top of his game. Just a game you have to ask whether it’s worth playing.

Tracks

Side 1

Games That Lovers Play
The “In” Crowd
Happy Heart
Aquarius
Lara’s Theme
American Patrol

Side 2

That’s Life
Toreadors’ March
Guantanamera
Happy Music
I Left My Heart In San Francisco
The Last Waltz

Final score:

6.5 out of 10

Label / Cat. No: Music For Pleasure MFP1406
First Released: 1968

What The Album Blurb Says…

Gladys Mills – one time superintendent of the typing department at the Paymaster General’s Office in London – turned professional pianist in 1962 at the age of forty, and has since become a household favourite. Mrs. Mills has been playing the piano for most of her life. She began at the age of three but lessons ended for her when she was twelve years old.

She was fourteen when she entered her first talent contest, and needless to say she won it. As a member of an amateur concert party Mrs. Mills travelled many hundreds of miles during the last war entertaining the troops, visiting camps, gun-sites and military hospitals throughout England.

It was at a golf club social evening that club member Paul Cave heard band pianist Mrs. Mills and gave her a phone number to ring. This she did and found herself booked to appear on Billy Cotton’s television show and to maker her first record.

Since that time Mrs. Mills has made countless records and her popularity has risen over the years. Hear her now on this record as she plays twelve bright and breezy tunes including Second-hand Rose, I’m Nobody’s Baby, Candy Floss and Oh Johnny! Oh Johnny! Oh!, together with many more, a tremendous selection of popular melodies with that extra touch that only Mrs. Mills can add, so why not sit back and listen to the cheerful sound of Your One and Only Mrs. Mills.

What I Say

OK, so I have a confession. This was the very first album I bought from a charity shop, all those years ago now, and purely because of my grim fascination with the cover. A middle aged woman in a maid’s outfit holding a feather duster and proffering a cup of tea? Why, that’ll sell millions!

The very first thing you need to remember about this classic album is that it was released in 1968. That’s one whole year after Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Heart’s Club Band, and I can’t think of two more different albums. While the Beatles broke down barrier after barrier and innovated in ways almost unimaginable, Mrs. Mills is squarely in the easy listening genre, and this album could have been made at any point in the twenty years up to 1968.

I do have a slight complaint, that although it promises on the front that the album is full of ‘piano favourites’, I have to say that they’re not my favourites, and nor are a majority played on a piano. This is Bontempi music for the masses, with subdued swing guitars, over enthusiastic closed hi-hat playing drummers and bored double bassists a-plenty. The arrangements do have one redeeming factor though – Mrs. Mills ‘piano’ is often so low in the arrangement and the mix that you’d be hard pressed to tell it was her album.

The overall effect though is that the faster numbers all sound like theme-tunes for seventies sit-coms, and the slow ones sound like the generic tunes played at a pensioner’s tea-dance in Morecambe on a wet-November. Actually that’s not quite fair. The faster numbers sound like the score to the film versions of seventies sit-coms. See, never say I’m not prepared to be fair about these matters.

The only exception is the final track, ‘Thank You Everybody’ which has an uncharacteristic edginess to it – a more 60’s production all round – shrill horns, fast paced, choppy time signatures. I’m not saying it’s an excellent example of contemporary music, but after the predictable twaddle that comprised the previous 11 tracks, this is a refreshing change. For that reason alone, I’ll stick up the whole song for you to “enjoy”.

I’m still baffled as to why this album was made – Mrs. Mills is far from being a concert pianist, and her contributions to this album seem to be less than technically demanding. As a crap pianist myself, I feel that I’m able to make these kind of ill-informed judgements with impunity! But she doesn’t stand out as a lead instrumentalist, and I can’t help get the feeling that someone’s just using her ‘fame’ to promote an album of bog standard, bland easy-listening. I fear poor Mrs. Mills has been sore abused, and I just hope that she didn’t become too disillusioned with the music industry after making this album.

Tracks

Side 1

Second-hand Rose
I Was Queen Victoria’s Chambermaid
Indian Summer
Newsboy
There’s A Blue Ridge Round My Heart Virginia
Alice Blue Gown

Side 2

Oh Johnny! Oh Johnny! Oh!
Someone Like you
Where The Black Eyed Susans Grow
Candy Floss
I’m Nobody’s Baby
Thank You Everybody

Final Score

7.5 out of 10